My siblings: Bob is the brother in the middle.
This picture was taken at our mother's funeral one year prior to Bob's passing.
This picture was taken at our mother's funeral one year prior to Bob's passing.
Can I share something very personal with you all? My brother was homeless a good share of his adult life. He passed away this year in May in his sleep, in his apartment. The biggest blessing of all was that we knew where he was when he died or we might not have ever known. He was highly intelligent. He was gentle and tender-hearted. He was a gifted artist and in his younger years his dream was to design cars. He served in Vietnam. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia in his mid-twenties. When he was on his meds he did alright for himself although he couldn't hold onto a job. People with schizophrenia don't know they are sick and they forget to take their meds so without supervision, he would slip off of them and then just walk away from all his material possessions and live in the streets until we could find him again and get him back on track.
May I share an even more personal and spiritual experience I had with this brother of mine? He was missing and homeless in November of 1998. I had 5 small children and we were living in Billings, MT. He was last seen in Pocatello, ID. It was cold. It had been over two months since anyone had seen or heard from him. He could have been dead. We didn't know. He had been known to hop a bus and get off at the next city, where ever that was. We thought he might have either gone back to Seattle or down to Salt Lake City. I told my Mom we'd come down to St. George, UT to see her for the holidays and that we'd stop in SLC to see if we could find him. It's a BIG city. The odds of finding one man who never stays put in a city that size were incredibly slim. You know, I often wondered what the purpose of his life was. He wasn't a contributing member of society and some might have viewed him as a drain on society. It occurred to me as I began searching the city that the purpose of his life was to enrich mine. He was my teacher. He was teaching me to forget about myself. He was teaching me to show care and compassion in the same way our creator shows us every day. That's what giving is all about, it's about manifesting unconditional love for our fellow man. It was my privilege and opportunity to seek out the ONE. I had no idea where to find him. But because we are God's children, I knew He knew where Bob was. So believing we could find him against all odds, Michael and I decided to start on the rough side of town and park outside of what appeared to be the local soup kitchen. Michael got out, locked the doors and went inside a run-down building to see if he could locate him. I sat in the car to wait when I looked across the street and there he was coming out of the building directly across from us! He was walking quickly so I had to hustle to get out of the car and get his attention. I was grateful he recognized me when I called his name and he came over and got in the car. As you could imagine, Michael was stunned when he came out of the building to find Bob sitting in the front seat next to me! We had all five children in the car with us and they were being very patient while we decided what to do next. Bob was weathered, hadn't shaved in months and only had the clothes on his back. He was confused. The voices in his head were all he could hear for the most part. He didn't seem to want our help but how do you put him back on the street after such a miracle took place to find him? We tried to get him to check in to the VA hospital but the patient has to be willing to check themselves in for the VA to treat him. Bob wasn't willing. So we took a picture with him for future reference in case we had to locate him via police identification, took him to eat, gave him some money, gave him our hat and mittens and dropped him off at the park. I looked in his eyes and told him I loved him. He smiled and patted me on the head and said, "you always were a good little kid." (I am 15 years younger than him.)
We spent the holiday with my mother and she asked us to find him again on the way back home to give him some more money. I wondered if it was possible to ask for a second miracle in the same week (as if there might be a shortage of blessings God is willing to bestow upon us, right?). No sooner did we drive into town and stopped at a red light but there was Bob walking in the crosswalk directly in front of our car! Coincidence? No. Divine intervention? Yes! It was almost too much to believe. On that corner, in that BIG city, at that very moment there he was. God knows us all. He knows where we are, what we are doing and what we need. And he sends others to help those who can't help themselves. Often times the prayers of others are answered because of the giving actions of those who are inspired (in spirit). From this experience I had a sure understanding that when we are in the service our fellow beings we are only in the service of our God.
On Thanksgiving this year I went down to a school in town that was putting on a free Thanksgiving dinner for over 1500 people. I was thinking of my brother. When Bob was on his meds and could share some of his street life experiences, he'd tell how people would stop and give him money for food or they would go into Burger King and buy him a hamburger. I'm so grateful that people didn't mistake him for a drunk because of the way he was walking and talking to himself or judge him for his unkempt appearance but rather they just gave freely of their means to help someone who couldn't help himself--unconditionally. We always tried to be there to help him but when he was lost, others stepped up with kindness and compassion to give him what he needed until we could find him again. So when I was serving up pie, I was thinking that maybe, in some small way, I was helping some body's loved one until they could be found. It was a perfect Thanksgiving.
When you see the face of the homeless take them into your heart. They are people who need our love and understanding. And they are our teachers. "Even the least of these are great in the sight of God."
2 comments:
Wow T. How wonderful of you to share something so close to your heart. I have to admit, it's not often that I have the opportunity to read a whole blog in one sitting, but I felt ver compelled and honored to read this story of your life. You life a life worth telling T, and that's what I love about you.
Matthew 25
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you?
The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me."
I'll pray for his soul.
Thanks T,
Chuck
I'm so glad I stopped to read this. Just the other day, McKenna and I stopped to have lunch at El Pollo Loco and when we walked up I saw a shopping cart full of items and knew right away that there was a homeless person inside. I walked in scanned the restaurant and found him in the back. I have to admit I was apprehensive at first bringing my 4 year old in wondering what to expect. I noticed others looking on and even the manager looking with judgmental eyes. He finally sat down with another man who had obviously bougt his lunch. At that moment my heart went out to him. I was frustrated at those around looking at him. I thought how compassionate it was for that man to buy him lunch and sit and visit. They left while we were still eating and I turned and looked around to see him pushing his cart away only to see the cart fall over and everything spill out of it. I about lost it right there. I wanted so badly to run out and help him but I couldn't pull McKenna away fast enough. When we finally got up he had everything cleaned up. I was so glad that the spirit spoke to me to have a feeling of compassion and not frustration or fear. And now after reading your story I will definetely look on with a more Christlike attitude and try and do something to help. Thanks for sharing.
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